I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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