guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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