I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
