I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Randomize