I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I just gift wrapped bread.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
When did angry sex become our thing?
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
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