There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I have feelings that need drinking.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
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