to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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