Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
A+ Viking dick
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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