the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Randomize
