margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I didn't shave. On purpose
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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