Soap is not a condiment
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
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