no, he came in my armpit
Who wears a wallet chain?!
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
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