They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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