Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards. http://tfl.nu/0s8j
  Replies (24) Good night (861) Bad night (6791)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come http://tfl.nu/9b59
  Replies (30) Good night (4171) Bad night (750)
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (321): I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code. http://tfl.nu/ho8g
  Replies (14) Good night (4418) Bad night (725)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that. http://tfl.nu/awcg
  Replies (21) Good night (4021) Bad night (1285)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary. http://tfl.nu/0qxf
  Replies (19) Good night (2954) Bad night (5922)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day. http://tfl.nu/q3s7
  Replies (20) Good night (4137) Bad night (1713)
• Favorite

  (340): View more from US Virgin Islands

  I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (340): I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting.. http://tfl.nu/wypp
  Replies (4) Good night (2150) Bad night (757)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight. http://tfl.nu/a50k
  Replies (7) Good night (2993) Bad night (755)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass. http://tfl.nu/vr1h
  Replies (12) Good night (2950) Bad night (622)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted http://tfl.nu/7mo3
  Replies (2) Good night (1621) Bad night (604)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid http://tfl.nu/32bb
  Replies (2) Good night (811) Bad night (308)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.

  (1-304): View more from West Virginia

  And vodka?

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  And vodka.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period. (1-304): And vodka? (304): And vodka. http://tfl.nu/b29x
  Replies (6) Good night (1530) Bad night (495)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft. http://tfl.nu/kmfz
  Replies (1) Good night (362) Bad night (794)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.

  (1-773): View more from Illinois

  Can you see in?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter. (1-773): Can you see in? http://tfl.nu/hc5g
  Replies (1) Good night (422) Bad night (597)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic. http://tfl.nu/k23m
  Replies (1) Good night (271) Bad night (162)

Randomize