My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldnâ€™t Be More Proud
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.