shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
