You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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