I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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