That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
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