Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
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