I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
