Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
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