ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
