u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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