I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
