Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
soo... how was my night?
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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