How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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