why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize