It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Randomize
