its not stalking. its research.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
