i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
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