You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
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tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
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The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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