no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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