oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
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