Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
