i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
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