You work out of a Hotel?
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Randomize
