forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
false alarm. still invincible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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