I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
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Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
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I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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