so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
My feet surprised me
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
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