FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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