Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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