just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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