I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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