just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize