I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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