somebody snuck up and got me drunk
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize