He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
