I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
