I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
