I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
