nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
